Life has been difficult, extremely so. I had to take emergency custody for their safety of my nephew and twin nieces one of which has complex medical issues. I had the children for over 2 months and I begged for financial assistance as we are struggling on UC ourselves! All I was told was it was a kin placement and financial support wasn’t available as I wasn’t a registered foster carer. The children were ultimately removed by a judge order due to lack of space in my 3 bed home with 6 living in it already. Support for low income kin carers isn’t there and now my niece with complex medical issues has been moved to a residential home in Nottingham we live in north wales, and my other niece and nephew are with a foster family in Anglesey. The whole process was a farce. It has left me feeling like a failure. Why isn’t there support for low income kin carers? Why were we left in a position that was unfair to myself, my family and my nieces and nephew. The “wise” judge has ripped a family apart and the council offered no support whatsoever even after me completing all mandatory training and all but emptying my home of our possessions to make room for the kids. We had plans for all the children to have a bed in a bedroom but that wasn’t good enough. I even had a call asking me to pick one of the children to keep…….like they are pick and mix!! It’s been a horrific period and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone! Sorry for the downer entry.

I have several health conditions which impact my mental health. Health professionals are sometimes unable to identify these mental health conditions that are caused by long waiting to get treated. Also, medication that is prescribed by health professionals also plays a great role for developing mental health as currently medication makes patients more drowsy and sleepy all day long which ultimately creates anxiety and stress. Never expressed my mental health concerns when I was at work in fear of getting less hours. Less hours of working may also put me into financial difficulties and ultimately my mental health problems could get worse.

So, I'm feeling pretty hopeful about that political news out of the UK this week. It's definitely too soon to tell exactly how things will shake out, but I'm really crossing my fingers that these changes end up bringing more stability and a clearer path forward. That said, I know that political shifts can be a bit of a bumpy ride, so I'll be keeping an eye on how these plans actually roll out and what they mean for folks' day-to-day lives before I get too set in my ways about it all.

When everything seems doom and gloom

Put in the news it’s all fighting and violence, scroll through social media again everyone moaning, posts that are depressing.

Little cash to do things with the kids, people beginning to post about day trips and holidays causing parent guilt as what’s a holiday it’s been that long? Kids constantly ask if they can go on holidays as their friends are.

I think social media can be a real cause of mental health because some people make out they have it all, they have top of the range phones, children in clubs, extravagant holidays, photo after photo of their perfect lives when in fact it’s all for show and to brag those very people are probably in so much debt. But not realising the pressure their posts put on those less fortunate.

Is it any wonder that mental health issues are on the rise? It’s a real shame that family time isn’t championed as laughter and fun is the best medicine so families should be helped and encouraged to have fun family times as this then helps the wellbeing of all. And why should holidays and fun be only really accessible to those more fortunate. Then there’s attendance fines which add more pressure to already struggling families.

Doing alright! As no other option, but mental health week means nothing to me as people say much including policymakers, funders, but on government level not sure what's happening as just to get a diagnosis takes years and years. No support around. All the systems are made for chaos, looks like still don't get anything, it's more exhausting and feel fed up along with mental health issues.

My work with changing realities is I just answer each questions. A big question every week. Well, I've received a couple of different cards. I'm very grateful and I'm proud for that, that I have done it, and that I've managed to get something for doing it, because I feel so proud that I can can do it myself, and in the future I would like to get more involved with changing realities and see where I can go from there.

It’s ages since I’ve been in here and wrote anything.

The truth is I’ve not had it easy and it’s been easier to hide away and try and shut the world out. I’ve had times when services have wanted to help me BUT they say what can we do to help you and I just can’t answer that because if I knew the answer I wouldn’t need help! So it’s been more easier to say it’s ok I don’t need help I help others.

Then they go away till the next malicious lies from my ex husband come (his way of continuing his mental cruelty)

Anyway this last time the police referred me to the mental health this certain policeman was the first to have sat and really listened and understood so for the first time ever I’m attending an appointment in the morning to try and get proper help …..

More money needs to be provided by our government to ensure those who struggle but are not yet in crisis don’t slip through the gaps but all it ever is is waiting lists.

Well mental health what do I say? I’ve suffered with this since a child I’ve had ongoing trauma all my life that’s never been dealt with, recently it’s got worse it’s the build up and has got on top of me/ I’m good at helping others but struggle to help myself. I help others claim what they are entitled to but again cannot face the forms for myself.

It’s hard having to be the strong one all the time, my brother was murdered a lot of years ago and I became the parent to my parents as they were consumed with grief, my kids have autism I am their carer, I run the local food bank, in fact this is the only reason I go out my house two days a week. But when I’m struggling no one is there …. GPs just give tablets saying they can’t take my problems away but the tablets will help deal with them. Mental health says I’m likely to get worse if they intervene. So I just plod on in the hope my lifelong bad luck ends. More needs to be out there for mental health , especially for when people have been through trauma that is life changing,

I feel it’s easier just to put on that mask and say I’m fine….

It has ben hectic for me the past month, I felt discouraged and I started isolating myself. Recently been registered with the specialist perinatal community mental health team and really hope to get better soon. This was too personal and I’m crying writing this down.

I'm really pleased that the Timms Review is currently in place because I recently had to phone PIP to report a change in my circumstances, but couldn't even get through to them in order to do so because not only did I have to wait ages just to speak to someone, but, when I did get through, they couldn't progress my call any further because I had 'failed the security screening' because I couldn't remember the exact date that my last payment from them was.

This security question must be fairly new, because I have never been asked that before. It also assumes that every caller does online banking (which I currently don't) or that we are calling them from home, and therefore would have our PIP award letter to hand in order to give them that information (which is not always the case either).

On the actual award letter (which I do now have in front of me) it states that you must report any changes of circumstance straight away 'using the phone number on the front page of this letter' which was exactly what I did, as I have the phone number stored on my phone, and was not at home when I made the call. Yet, on nowhere else of the letter does it state that once you phone them, you will need to let them know when your last payment was, as this would be part of your security vetting.

I reckon the sooner the Timms PIP Review is done, the better, because of my recent experience with them.

What option have we got? Especially when you are a single migrant parent. There is no support around us. We can't rely on anyone, we need to be keep going as we know if we don't wake up or leave the bed, nothing will be done. Just keep going and surviving and existing. It is a default mode now.

These proposed changes have taken an emotional toll on me as a mother. The uncertainties of waiting maybe ten or more years for settlement keep on piling up and this very thing just increases my stress. I'm worried constantly about what will happen to our family in future; the whole nine yards. When our position is temporary, for so long, it is often hard to rest, feel at home, or plan. The insecurity of being in this state is one that influences not only me, but also the health and happiness of my entire family.